Yet To Be Titled

Broken homes, health issues, failed relationships, lost jobs............. world class disappointments?

Those very things caused Richard to act on the doubts that they created. And what about me? Which situations have and do cause me to act on the doubt? Oh, in case you don't already know what the doubt is it's simply this. Does God really care? And if so, why won't He reach down and fix the things that go wrong-----at least some of them! For me the question at times has been slightly different. If He does care, and not about the things of life but about what I have thought I was doing as God things why won't He take care of the issues that come with those things. Yes I know that everything I have done thinking it was a God thing has not necessarily been. But is that why the prayers over and for those things seemingly go unanswered?

Those disappointments took Richard to a place of anger and pain. He experienced them as matters of betrayal rather than matters of faith. The book goes on to break down disappointments into three separate questions that nobody really speaks out loud.

THREE QUESTIONS NO ONE ASKS ALOUD

Is God unfair? Richard tried to follow God and yet his life fell apart. And yet there are people who deny God and they prosper anyway. Nothing new to this question it is as old as Job and has been a stumbling block to faith for generations.

Is God silent? Richard begged God for clear direction. Each time he thought he had God's will figured out it his choice led him to failure. Richard like all of us have been told that God loves us and most of us have been taught that God has a plan for us, a plan not to harm us but to prosper us. So why doesn't he just tell us what that plan is with absolute clarity?

Is God hidden? Richard felt that God should somehow prove himself. His question was, "How can I have a relationship with someone I'm not sure exists?"

A true atheist I presume does not feel disappointment with God as they expect nothing and supposedly receive nothing from God. BUT.... for those of us who commit our lives to God, we no matter what, instinctively expect something in return. That sounds terrible as I read it back to myself but I must admit that deep down it's true. Are my expectations wrong? What are the promises in the word for if not to bring hope and some expectation?

Philip and Richard did not see each other for about three years. When they ran into each other in a mall Richard said, "Life is treating me much better now." He had a promising job and had put his failed relationship behind him. As for the subject of God, cynicism covered the wounds and he was as angry with God as ever. Richard shared how from the time of his conversion to faith he had always searched for hard evidence of God verses acceptance by faith. He said that when he spoke to pastors about his quest for evidence they would tell him to believe whether he felt like it or not and the feelings will eventually follow. Richard said, "They never did so I just faked it." Richard then shared the one story that he had determined as the beginning point of his doubt. For the sake of time I'll share the basics of the story. I think it's important as over the years people have shared a single incident as the starting point for successes and failures in their life.

Richard saw Katheryn Kuhlman on television and one day saw that she would be in a town nearby and so he skipped school and went to see her. One person came to the meeting on a stretcher and walked out of the meeting. He was healed from lung cancer and had been told he only had months to live. But tonight he declared that he was healed, and he felt great. Richard determined that he had seen the living proof he was searching for. One week later Richard decided he wanted to meet the man and so he got a phone number. He called and asked to speak to the man and all he heard was long silence. Eventually the woman spoke the words, "My... husband... is...dead!" Richard was devastated and from that moment on uncertainty outweighed certainty. Everything from that time on was to find proof that God was out there. Richard summed up the conversation by saying, "if there is a God then He is just toying with us and He should stop playing games and show Himself."

Are those three questions the real questions or do they boil down to one question? Do I believe in God? And if I do, what do I believe about Him? For me that would mean that I would have to know something about who He is. That does not mean that I understand all there is about them. When I go home at night I walk in the door and flip on the light switch and my expectation is usually met with light filling the room. I do not understand how that all works. But there are times when that light goes out. It could be a burnt out bulb which really has nothing at all to do with the source of the light... or does it? The power is still coming to the socket yet there is no light? There are times when the power is disrupted. Yet it does not cause me to doubt the switch. Every day I still come home and every day I still go to the switch with that same expectation. During hurricane season a few years ago the that switch sometimes met and sometimes did not meet my expectation. yet it did not deter me from going to the switch or dampen my expectaion.